


It's just like riding a roller coaster

by alternate_me



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angel Castiel, Crazy Castiel, Cute, Fear of Flying, Fluff and Humor, Flying, M/M, Sam Winchester Ships Castiel/Dean Winchester, Season/Series 07, crazy!Cas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-18
Updated: 2015-10-18
Packaged: 2018-04-26 22:07:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5022301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alternate_me/pseuds/alternate_me
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean has explained uncountable times to Cas that he doesn't like flying. It doesn't matter whether it's the fastest way to get to Sam, there is no way he'll let Cas do it. </p>
<p>But, these days, who actually knows what goes on in Cas's mind? And who can control what he does?<br/>Sometimes he is not even listening; others, he may just do what he wants to.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's just like riding a roller coaster

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know whether I have anything to say about this one.
> 
> It's cute, short, and Cas decides to fly - carrying Dean with him.
> 
> That pretty much sums it up.

Dean stepped out of the gas station shop, carrying a bag with some snacks in it. The day was sunny and hot, there was almost no cloud in the sky. He walked towards the Impala, which was parked by the side of the road. Cas was leaning against the passenger door. He still wore the white clothes from the hospice where he had spent most of the past months.

“Hey” Dean said, as he approached the car “I called Sam, he said we need to get there asap, apparently he has news on Dick”

Cas had his hands in his pockets, he looked down, rocking back and forth.

“Dean” he said, slowly “you know I can’t fight. If you’re planning something that involves me in it” he sighed “I’m sorry, but those days are over for me”

Dean rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, yeah, you’ve mentioned it – a couple of times, actually. But we’ll discuss that later” he tossed the bag on the back seat and looked at Cas on the opposite side of the Impala.

“I think we should get going, Sam did say it was big news”

To Dean’s surprise, as he opened the door, Cas started walking around the car, till he was in front of him. Dean held the door open, looking at Cas with a doubtful expression as he approached him.

“What are you doing? Cas?”

At the moment, Dean wasn’t in the mood for crazy Cas. They had been working hard for a while to raise some information on Dick, and, by Sam’s voice, it was really important. 

Cas stopped in front of Dean, and tilted his head to the side. Then, as Dean kept looking at him, frowning, he raised his hands, reaching out for Dean’s forehead.

“Hey, hey, hey” Dean said, inclining his body backwards “What are you doing?”

Cas seemed to be confused. 

“I thought you’d said we should get there as soon as possible” he frowned “That’s what asap mean, isn’t it?”

“Uh, yeah. But I’ve also told you before that I don’t like being zapped anywhere. It’s really uncomfortable”

Cas shrugged. 

“It’s because of the speed with which I take you there” he looked up at the sky for a while. He seemed to be thinking about something.

Then, when Dean was about to say something, he looked at him again. 

“I can take you more slowly. Thinking over, it’s been a while since I don’t appreciate the view from up high”

“You mean actually flying?” Dean asked, suddenly unease.

Cas shrugged.

“Yes”

Dean stood still for one moment. He had never told Cas about how he actually felt when the subject was flying, but he sensed that it was a good moment to do so.

“Cas-” Dean paused, licking his lips and looking down.

“I hate flying, okay?” he finally said “And there is no way I’m going to let you do this”

Cas tilted his head to the side, a little disappointed.

“At first, I didn’t enjoy flying too - when Gabriel taught me”

Dean scoffed.

“Oh, Gabriel taught you? I wonder why you didn’t like it”

Cas stood in front of him, as thought he was trying to remember something to say.

“It’s like… riding a roller coaster” he finally said.

Dean widened his eyes in surprise.

“Have you ever ridden a roller coaster, Cas?”

“No” Cas looked down, a little embarrassed “But some people say it’s just like it. You know, they say you feel terrified - as if you’re going to die -, but, deep down, you actually enjoy that sensation”

Dean raised questioning eyes at Cas and the angel cleared his throat.

“Well, maybe not as if you’re going to _die_ " he tried to elaborate "But it’s a terrifying feeling, as though you were letting yourself go without being certain whether you’re going to come back whole”

Dean nodded, pursuing his lips. There was a moment before he answered Cas.

“Yeah, that-that wasn’t much helpful either"

“Have _you_ ever ridden a roller coaster?” Cas asked, looking at Dean again, suddenly curious.

“Uh-uh, no” Dean said, trying to figure out whether they would now actually talk about roller coasters “I’ve always wanted to, but, uh, I guess there has never been a good opportunity, our dad never took us to stuff like that. But well, I would probably hate it, because of, you know, _it's just like flying_.”

Dean expected that it would make Cas satisfied, but the angel just looked ahead again, as though he was wondering about something. Dean lowered his head, trying to figure out what to say next. Then he heard Cas’s voice again.

"It’s like falling in love”

Dean looked up fast, surprised.

“What?”

“Riding a roller coaster. It’s like falling in love. So flying must have the same effect”

It took Dean a moment to answer that one.

“Okay, Cas, look, first of all: if you didn’t understand it, I’ll say it as clear as possible: I’m not going to let you take me on a flight, forget it, never going to happen. Second” and he frowned before saying it “Who the hell says that _riding a roller coaster_ is like _falling in love_?”

“Well, love appears to be a source of both suffering and happiness to humans, so I thought it could be the same feeling. And that maybe you could relate t-“

“Cas, please, can we go? We don't have time for this, Sam did say it was urgent” Dean said, but he couldn’t help smiling slightly at Cas’s insane comparison. 

Cas lowered his eyes after Dean’s words, and went silent. Dean rolled his eyes as he stood in front of him, as if he was waiting for Dean to say something. There was an uncomfortable silence in the air. The hot midday sun made the top of Dean’s head hurt.

“Look, Cas, I wasn’t planning on being rude to you, okay” he patted Cas on the shoulder and Cas looked at him “And anyway, it’s nothing personal, really. I just don’t enjoy flying, okay?”

Cas looked down, apparently resigned.

“Okay”

Dean smiled, relieved that he had been able to convince Cas to let that go, he wasn’t always able to do it when Cas set his mind on something. Cas walked past Dean, heading towards the back of the car. Dean sighed, ready to get in the Impala, when he suddenly heard the sound of wings flapping.

When he was about to turn around, he felt Cas’s arms hugging him from behind, right below his armpits. Dean froze, blushing at once. He was ready to say something when he heard Cas’s voice.

“Come on, it will be fun”

More wings flapping.

“What the-“

And then, Dean couldn’t feel the ground below his feet anymore. Butterflies flew in his stomach. Cas pulled him up and he watched the Impala getting far away.

“ _Shit_ ” he said, closing his eyes, his hands clutching Cas’s trench coat.

He wanted to say something else, but a sudden airflow blew against him, his heart raced in his chest and he could feel his hands sweaty. 

The wind got stronger by the minute. He opened one eye and realized the Impala was just a tiny black dot down there. 

“Cas, PUT ME DOWN, _right now_ ” he finally was able to speak.

He could listen to Cas’s voice on his ear, the wind made it sound a little muffled.

“You’ve said that Sam needs us, Dean. Flying is faster than driving, but it isn’t fast enough to make you sick”

“I don’t-“ he gulped, closing his eyes again, his voice squeaky “I don’t care, just _take me to the fucking ground_ ”

Cas took a while to answer.

“No”

“Cas, I’m going to kill you when we land”

Cas ignored him completely. Dean couldn’t know whether Cas was having fun, or he genuinely thought he was doing a nice thing to him. Dean kept his eyes closed, holding onto Cas as much as he could.

A few moments passed by, the sensation of not feeling the ground behind his feet was still terrifying Dean. Then, he felt as Cas moved his arms a little bit, inclining them to the left.

“Oh, look down there. I’ve visited that forest recently. There are very interesting bees in it” 

Dean opened his eyes and saw what he could only describe as being a green carpet. He closed his eyes at once. But Cas was still interested in it, for he tilted his head to look down, a bit adrift. Then Dean suddenly felt his embrace loosening a bit. He freaked out.

“Cas, watch out! You’ll drop me” 

He _really_ didn’t need crazy, distracted Cas at that moment.

“Don’t worry, Dean” he could hear the angel’s voice on his hear, he sounded amused and Dean really wished he could punch him then “Remember that I pulled your ass out of Hell, so I think I can handle this”

“Well, but it doesn’t look like I’m safe with you holding me like that”

“Okay, if you wish, I can hold you differently”

“That’s not what I me-?“

Dean’s sentence was interrupted by the middle and his heart skipped a beat as he felt Cas taking one hand off him. Then, Cas pulled him up with the one hand which was still on Dean, and ended up catching him on his arms.

When Dean felt Cas’s hold on him, he opened his eyes slowly, a terrified expression on them. He met Cas’s face, only a few centimeters from his, as Cas held him close to his chest. Dean could feel his face heating up even with all the terror which he was feeling at the moment.

“Cas, what are you doing?”

Dean could feel very vividly where Cas's arms and hands grabbed him, and he could also feel his body was suddenly heating up in response to his touch. He felt a sudden feeling of desperation inside him.

“Sorry, Dean, I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable”

“I’m not-I’m _not_ uncomfortable” Dean said fast.

He looked down, trying to avoid Cas’s eyes, but then, as he saw the ground far away below him, he looked up again, focusing on one of the buttons on Cas’s trench coat. Then the sense of proximity was bothering him again, and he tried to avoid thinking about it, or about the fact that Cas was so close to him, or that he had his hands gripping his body strongly. 

“You’re blushed” Cas said, his clear blue eyes fixated on Dean’s.

“Yeah, Cas, I’m _angry_ , because you don’t want to take me to the fucking ground”

Dean’s lips trembled a bit as he looked at Cas, but what could he do? It was looking at Cas or at the ground, and he definitely wouldn’t look at the ground.

He unconsciously bit his inferior lip, looking again at Cas’s trench coat. He could feel the heat of Cas’s body against his, contrasting with the cold wind which blew on them, and they were so close that he could feel Cas’s warm and wet breath on his head. Dean looked up again, and Cas was staring at him, his intense blue eyes fixated on him, and then Dean suddenly felt his jeans getting tighter.

_Shit_.

Suddenly, Cas started talking again, to Dean’s relief, who was desperate to find something on which he could focus rather than Cas’s blue eyes and Cas’s hands.

“I think that if I put you on my back, maybe you’ll feel a little-“ and he took one hand off Dean again.

“No, _no_ ” 

Dean panicked as he felt Cas holding him with only one hand again. He wrapped his arms around Cas’s neck, pressing himself against his chest.

“It’s okay, it’s okay, Cas, just, please, just _hold_ me”

Dean would like to tell himself that it was fear what made him fasten his grip on Cas and bury his face on his neck, but he couldn’t be sure at the moment. All he could think of was that Cas smelled pretty well. There was something sweet about it. Honey, maybe.

At that moment, Dean didn’t actually care about the fact that he was embracing Cas. He told himself that he could worry about that when he weren’t several feet above the ground. So Dean closed his eyes and let that sweet fragrance involve him, and that made him forget for a moment that he was actually flying. For those seconds, there were only Cas, and Cas’s hands, and Cas’s smell. 

And if Dean’s eyes weren’t closed, he might have seen the moment when Cas’s lips curved up in a slight smile.

***

Sam was outside Rufus’s cabin, sat on the front stairs. He knocked his feet on the ground, impatient. It should take Dean and Cas still a couple of hours till they arrived there in the Impala, and he had nothing else important to do at the moment.

Then, he suddenly heard the familiar sound of wings, and he looked around, expecting to see Cas and Dean appear out of nowhere. There wasn’t anyone there. But the sound continued - stronger by the second - and then Sam instinctively looked at the sky. He widened his eyes when he spotted a known trench coat above him, and he opened his mouth in surprise as he realized the trench coat was carrying a plaid shirt.

Cas landed softly in front of Sam, Dean still on his arms, eyes closed and body pressed against Cas’s. Sam smiled widely.

“Dean, we’re here” Cas said, and Dean opened his eyes immediately as he listened to Sam’s laugh.

Dean pulled away from Cas, putting his feet to the ground as fast as he could. He staggered, almost falling to the ground, and then he looked at Cas, his face was blushed again.

“Never do that again” Dean said, raising one finger as he said it.

Then, he turned his back at Cas, glancing fast at Sam. He walked awkwardly towards the cabin, his hand discreetly in front of his groin.

Dean entered the cabin first, followed by Sam and then Cas. As Cas got in, he looked to the side, suddenly distracted by something in the air. Dean looked back and rolled his eyes when he saw Cas walking away from them and looking outside through a window.

Dean resumed his walk and sat on an armchair, sighing, completely exhausted. He and Cas had been travelling for a couple of days and it had really drained his energy. In addition to that, he was trying to appear fine about all the flight thing, but the truth was that his heart was getting back to its normal speed, and he was only starting to feel his legs again at that moment.

He looked down, not wanting to face Sam. The memory of himself burying his head on Cas’s neck came to him, and he also remembered Cas’s skin texture and warmth, till he realized that he was blushing again. Dean cleared his throat and looked up, trying to remember something that Sam had told him over the phone, something that should be really important.

Sam walked slowly towards him, pursuing his lips and looking down.

“So, Dean” he said as he approached him. 

Dean looked up.

“Did you enjoy the flight?” Sam smirked.

Dean rolled his eyes at Sam, his features showed that he was really annoyed.

“Shut up”

“Oh, but you certainly looked comfortable on… Cas’s arms”

Dean glanced alarmed at Cas, but the angel was still staring at something outside. Dean was relieved for a moment and then he looked back at Sam quickly, putting a sarcastic smirk on his face with some difficulty.

“Oh, you got that from my terrified expression and my closed eyes?”

“You know, you _really_ didn’t look that terrified to me”

“Well, but I _was_ ” he sighed, impatient “Cas’s crazy, okay? He took me without my permission, and he _knew_ I hate flying”

Sam pulled a chair and sat beside him. He shrugged, looking at Dean, who was avoiding eye-contact.

“Well, maybe it was good, you know” Sam said, and he was completely serious when he said it, what made Dean look back at him “Maybe that will help you to get over your fear, or to know yourself better, I don’t know”

Dean met sincerity on Sam’s eyes. He was expecting anything – a smirk, a sarcastic comment – but that. It made him a little disconcerted, and he didn’t actually know how to answer his brother. But apparently Sam knew what to do. He got up, stretching himself, and he looked at Dean once again.

“You know, we don’t always know ourselves as well as we may think we do”

Dean was about to ask Sam what the hell that was supposed to mean, when he started talking again.

“Well, I’m going to take my computer to show you guys what I've found about Dick. After all, you _did_ make a hard effort to be here soon, right, Dean?” and the playful look was back on Sam’s face.

Curiously, that last comment didn’t bother Dean as much as the first ones. On his way to the kitchen, Sam patted Dean on the shoulder and then turned his back at him, rolling his eyes in the process. 

As Sam left, Dean raised his head slightly and saw Cas approaching him again. Apparently anything he had seen – or imagined – outside the house had gone away or had stopped being interesting. Cas got closer to Dean and then sat on the chair where Sam was sat before. He looked ahead, completely adrift.

“Did you know that a butterfly lives in average only one month?”

Dean frowned.

“Really?”

Dean stared at Cas as he said those words, but he wasn’t actually listening. Sam’s voice echoed in his head as he looked at the beautiful and distant blue eyes. _You sure looked comfortable_. And he recalled the flight, Cas’s hold on him, his smell. _on Cas’s arms_.

Dean gulped down, suddenly uncomfortable again. He moved awkwardly on the armchair, looking down as Cas told him a detailed explanation of the life of a butterfly. 

Dean was trying to forget those few minutes - when he was on Cas's arms. He wanted to tell himself that those moments were the worst ones of his life, and the truth was that he'd never felt so scared. But deep down, there was that annoying feeling inside of him - the feeling he didn’t want to admit to himself that was there-, scratching his stomach: an unrequired happiness.

Dean sighed. Maybe it actually was like riding a roller coaster.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys have enjoyed it!   
> (if there were any typos, or confusing sentences, please let me know. I was _really_ sleepy when I corrected it)
> 
> Thank you so much for reading <3
> 
> And, as always, leave a comment, I'll really appreciate it :)


End file.
